to my heart

everyday im waiting. everynight im calling. everytime youre welcome to my heart. ive not say this for long 4 months haha believe in me and js always do ok? aint a liar. its bcs ive been single for that period. without any loves from anyone. i mean as a partner of mine. ok fine, boyfriend to be exact. js im not usually cl the one who got special place that more than friend in my heart as a that one you and commonly called Boyfriend. so whut eit neither me care abt that.

so things going here. yesterday, ok again otp. ah begin macamni, im calling for triple time and he didnt pick up and click the green button. fine shahrul.............in 15 minutes later im calling again. for twice, yeah i think so lah. and the third time is finally...ok happy with it. im asking him to js continue with memey. and he was like ala takpe dah nak habis pun eh dah habis dah mhmm nvm, go on je. lepastu kan ala nant you tak cl i balik and i was like mestilah en haha. and he continues it with his ala ala ala tu....one question*wink! awak rasa cute lah kan cakap ala tu..luckily is a fact i cannot deny. lol start with me. with the merepek girl.

stories then im js hung up the cl. and wait for 10 minutes. as he said tinggal lagi 10 minit je. oye im teasing him yknow hah har im saying that you nak i tunggu you mcm org bodoh ke, he's voice clearly state he was feeling bersalah macamtu. atotototo. mhmm on waiting tu, saya update dekat status yg bunyinya macam menyalahkan dia. dia comment ckp ok fine huehuehue :D toingg cowy lah awak, caye caje je.. then im calling him. we was talking abt well usually things. dah makan tgh buat ape hows ur life tudei and belabelabela. and the time tu taktau nak ckp ape so im asking him, what izit actually things he was hidding from me. i mean the-one-day-he-will-tell-things tu. he was saying kalau im telling mine so then he will tell his. im saying no cant be liddat. hahaha am transform to the demand girl of faa. and he was finally....tell me.

nah the things is js i nak you yg dulu. yg suka gelak yg ceria yg suka buli i adui woi woi. dia perli aku ke ape tu ngehngeh -..- and then im telling mine. mhmm im explaining everything. im saying sorry abt lying him. pastu dia ckp you tau tak i syg you ok im not finish my words yet masetu so im js like sabar bg i habis ckp. and im saying this and that thing. i tell him the truth abt our deal, that actually i dont want to deal liddat. im regret abt it. and aku ckp kat dia aku tarik balik kata kata aku. aku ckp takpayah lah buat aku benci dia buang perasaan semua. js stay the way i am. iyep! the way hopeless girl i am. thats it. then dia diam...pastu dia start ckp ok actually i nak you yg dulu. i suka you. i taknak you buang perasaan tu. -thundersound-  tidak sangka gila ok awak. ya Allah rasa nak menangis aku, im so touched with his words. and im asking him so that knp mlmtu ckp macamtu. and dia menjawab yg dia ikut kate aku. he says that me sound like really nak buang perasaan tu, so thats why.

hella im happy. then im starting to explain everything again. dia jugak cakap tell me everything. takde benda yg disorok dah. unless i wont answer ur cl. pandai dah awak ugut saya. so aku pun bagitau jelah. actually at the beginning talking abt this, his voice change. to the moody one. likkah mad one. and then he asking me you syg i tak i answer him a yes but in the sarcastic tone heheh. mhmm then im asking him uwhat is on his mind. nothing. is his answer. ok im feeling so idiotic. he says he cares for me so that he want to know this evrything and bukan tak ambil berat pasal aku. well peeps my mean is im telling those embrassing thing of mine, likeim losing my pride and he didnt feel anything. i mean he didnt give respond that can answer the faqing question in myself. im confuse. so conclusion is im stupid. en en. pastu dia diam.

things go on with his question. am i loving him. im saying yes with no doubt. and im asking him do you want me to love you? more than friend? he..yes i do want. tearing..jgn tanye cs dk (dontknow) why. he said that he gonna give a try to talk with memey and move on with me. actually he did try once, and memey avoid it. cover the talking. mhmm, until when ive to wait?

i sayang you you sayang i. is coming officially form his mouth ok. ya Allah betapa lah im feeling so gonna success to build my castle in the sky iyargh! and we end the talking with my asks. so anything else mhmm maybe ur last word.....trenggg he says i love you. god....i cant believe that i can still hear that from him. from person that i love. from person that im shying the most. from person that im lying abt things to cover up my true feelings. from person that i thought not gonna be mine forever! :' nah im happy instead of getting hurt with waiting. dearie, i really can wait for you. cs ill never let you go. ill be with you if you want to. going through the day and make everything ok. youre all i need as my mhmm lover.

im not gonna judge ur cute face as always tu ok huehuehue.

count the stars to know how much im hoping and be patient to wait for you.

tell me what day that youre totally not sleep to prove that im loving you always.

owned the sky so that you know how hard for me to let you go.

i love you is yes an easy words to speak it for anyone.

but its hard for me to mean it like i do on you.